Yesterday, we tackled the conversations between my husband and I. Today, let’s look at what happens with coworkers.
Me: (Looking at inspiration photos for a bath design.) Man, these people really love toothbrushes.
(Co-workers J and K come over to look at the photo on my computer, where there are three toothbrush holders with toothbrushes on the corner and a box of toothbrushes in the open drawer.)
K: They’re a dentist.
Me: But the toothbrushes aren’t packaged!
K: Not a dentist.
Me: I mean, I can see using old toothbrushes for cleaning or something, but you wouldn’t keep them all together, right?
J: No, I don’t know what that is.
Me: I mean, I have a couple of old toothbrushes for cleaning but they’re with cleaning supplies. Except for the toothbrush I use for my taxidermy. That’s with my taxidermy stuff. (I then recount the conversation with G about my taxidermy toothbrush. Before I finish:)
K: Did G shake his head and sigh?
Me: Yeah. Oh, then there’s the toothbrush I use on my rat when I give her a bath.
J: Remind me to never use a toothbrush at your house.
Me: It’s not like I keep them all in the toothbrush holder with the toothbrushes we use in our mouths!
Unlike these people.
Fin.
At lunch, we are discussing pandas. Coworker J mentions how her husband doesn’t like that people have to dress like pandas when handling pandas.
Me: Well, their coloring has to do with their sight. They can only see in high contrast, so when they see another panda they know it’s another panda because of the distinct markings. The handlers dress like pandas, because then the pandas think they too, are pandas.
(At this point, my brain makes it’s usual leaps.)
Like my rat. Rats don’t have great eyesight, so they sniff a lot to figure out what things are around them. She gets really sniffing sometimes, and I can hear it. It’s kind of hilarious and adorable.
My coworker, C, is looking at me quizzically for a moment. Then,
C: Oh, you mean your live rat. For a minute I thought you were talking about your taxidermied rat. Whew, for a minute I was trying to figure out if you were crazy.
Me: Yeah, of course, it’s Billy Corgan. My taxidermied rat doesn’t really do much of anything.
So, there you have it. I might just be the queen of weird conversation.
I agree, you are the queen of weird conversation and that wasn’t the weirdest conversation we have ever had at work!
The thing is, I’m not even *trying* to make weird conversation. It just comes out!