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Archive for July, 2004

Now what am I supposed to do???

Friday, July 30th, 2004

I actually have an (almost) entire day off. I seriously do not know what to do with myself. I had to give a tour (which went fine), and othersiwe, no commitments. I feel as though I should be somewhere, working. Such a strange feeling. I did get a workout in (which made for 4 this week. Not bad, considering I’ve been working nearly 15 hour days most of the week.)…which was nice. I also got the stuff I needed to finish organizing my bathroom. So, I think that will be what I do with the rest of my day. Turn on some tunes, and get cozy with a bottle of lysol.
I am excited for tomorrow. I do have to work from 7:30 am to 11 p.m., but I am actually going out. Dancing. I can’t remember the last time I went dancing. Considering I used to go out dancing two or three times a week…this is sad. So, this will ideally become a regular thing.
Also, in the happy news field, I noticed a job posting for a position I am interested in at work. Part of me is afraid. I think it is because I hold myself to an impossibly high standard, that is impossible for me to attain, so I feel like I would not be good enough for the job. Oh well, i will have to go in early one day and apply for the position, and see what happens. If I get it, I will only have to work one job, and it will solve some financial issues and insurance issues.
Well, I need to tackle that bathroom. Whoohooo!

Five minutes please, just five minutes!

Wednesday, July 21st, 2004

So, I find today’s title extremely clever. However, I think anyone who wasn’t living in the metro Detroit area at least five years ago may not find it so. I thought about adding the rest of the ad including the flamingos practicing their chorus line, but why beat a dead reference? Or did I do exactly that?
Anyhoo, I’m in between jobs today, and have five minutes before I leave. Since I’ve been such a terrible blogger as of late, I figured I’d better jump at this opportunity.
I was putting some stuff away yesterday (things still in boxes from the great office remodel of 2004), and found my old journal. I kept it for roughly the year before I moved out here. I read it. Methinks I should start writing in it again (in my free time). All those things that just don’t belong here. I have to admit that reading it was pretty fascinating. It was as though I was reading something about someone else. Someone who was young and interesting and rebellious. Someone for who everything was so easy. When did life get so complicated? So, now I am all introspective. It goes along with my weeding out all the extra material crap I don’t need right now. It looks like i should be weeding other things as well…prioritizing and all that. Man, I think it was easier without the extra introspectivity* going on.
Sigh. Stupid journal.
*Yeah that probably isn’t a word. I’m already on the run from the OED police.

All warm and tingly…

Tuesday, July 20th, 2004

…and not in that way.
Today at the not-so-new-anymore job, my boss came up to me. She told me that a comment card had been filed about me. She said it in that way that only sounds like it is going a bad place.
However, someone took the time to write that I was super helpful and friendly. She mentioned that she wasn’t sure what our store’s procedure was, but other stores have some sort of pin that you get when something good like that happens.
Since people these days rarely acknowledge the positive, it was a pleasant surprise. I gave me a boost today, which after working for umpteen days solid, I needed that.
On a side note, why do managers make it sound like they are going to have a talk with you when they are about to tell you something good? At a previous job (I was a server), I was tipping out the bartender, who was also a trainer. She asked me if Rick, the manager, had talked to me yet. He hadn’t, and again, the manager having a talk with you is rarely a good thing. She goes on that some ladies I had waited on had requested to speak to a manager, and started to go on and on about their server–I’m trying to rack my brain as to what I could have possibly done wrong–because she was so nice and accomodating, and so on. I never saw that coming. Especially since it was a table of campers during lunch rush. But, apparenty my acting skills are at least useful somewhere. So, I should be able to rest knowing that while I am figuring out what the hecate to do with my life, I can always work the service industry. 😛

Spank me

Monday, July 19th, 2004

I’m kidding. No, really, if you want to…
So, a few days ago at the not-so-new-anymore job, I noticed a woman shopping with a little boy. Well, at least I am guessing he was a boy. He had some apparent developmental issues, as well as some physical ones. He looked like an adult, shrunken down, but like something went wrong in the shrinking process. They came back two days ago, and were asking me when the catalogs would be available. I remembered the women, because they were with the boy. Now, I never thought anything derogatory about the boy, but I noticed him, remembered him, and my heart knotted up a little when I saw him. I wondered what his life was like, and what his family’s life was like. Then, I felt like a really bad person for actually thinking about it. There’s this part of me that feels like I should be able to look at people as just people. then there’s this part that figures we should acknowedge our diversity.
Today, two women came to me to ask about the location of a frame for some prints. It just happened that the woman carrying the prints was a little person, er at least I think that is the PC way of phrasing it…if it isn’t please for the love of all that is good correct me. I know that she is a fully grown, fully capable person. Yet, there was that part of me that couldn’t help but thinking she was adorable. Then I mentally chided myself, as she was an adult. At the same time, I don’t know her, I don’t know what her perceptions are, or how she feels about others’ perceptions of her. Maybe she is offended that some may find her adorable, maybe she works it….I guess I don’t know. Of course, I treated her just like everyone else that I come in contact with, polite and friendly, I had no reason to do otherwise.
Conversely,there are people who are exceptionally hip, or beautiful, that illicit a similar response, in that I can’t help but look a little longer, or think a little more. However, if you say to someone, “Hey, that is one kickass ensemble, ” it’s usually cool. In other cases, where are the lines? What is “acceptable” behavior? Should one think about these things? I guess I can’t see it being appropriate to aske every person what their deal is, at the same time, what should be acknowledged? Are there things that shouldn’t?
I guess that in my quest to be a better human being, I wonder what is the “right,” for lack of a better word, path? While I feel there are normal responses, there is also this ability to reason that we humans have that seems to throw a wrench in the whole thing. I mean, just because something is natural, doesn’t necessarily make it okay.
There I go thinking way too much about things. I can’t jsut accept things. I have to go tinkering and poking until I find whatever truth is behind it. Until I find the why. Until I fix it, for whatever that’s worth. In the meatime, I feel like a not-so-good person, whilst rolling some of those things around in my head.

I suck, and that’s sad.

Friday, July 16th, 2004

Egad…I have been one busy chicka. Who knew that working three jobs would be so time consuming? Not me. First, there’s the main job, then the secondary job, which got way more hectic than normal this month, then there is the third job, which I want to be the main job, so I can quit the current main job and secondary job, and lead a marginally normal life.
Anyway, I figured I ought to breeze in and post, since I haven’t posted in so long that my page is blank. Unintentionally, mind you. I love my third job. I love the company, I love the people (well, not love them, because that would probably be against some company policy), I don’t love the uniform, but if my face were pierced, I could leave the jewelry in…so that has to count for something, eh? I had my first day with people in the store on Saturday. It was pretty low key. Sunday, we had a huge party. The company booked a three-hour cruise up the Mississippi. It was an absolute blast. We were sad to see the dock approach at the end of the night. We had one day off, one day of last minute details, and then MADNESS! Wednesday was the big opening, and it was insane. Today was marginally less insane, but good. We went out for a drink after work, which was nice…and now here I am. Typing an entry in my undies.
On a non-work related note…my sis and the fam were here for a stretch. They left today. I miss them already. I just feel badly about not being able to hang with them more, but with work being what it is…not so much 🙁 I am sure I will write about their visit soon…along with some other musings that have been on hold. For now, I am enjoying the eerie silence of my house.
Oh, and to answer the burning question….pay bills. Yup, I am just living that far on the edge. Which for some odd reason reminds me, that I need to find some free time somewhere to go to the gym. Must. Get. In. Shape. I just got the video of a local TV thing I did last October… reminded me ofhow chunky-monkey I was, and that I don’t want to go back. I should move my arse out of bed tomorrow and go.
I’ll keep you posted on how that goes for me.